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The 30,000 Volt Electrifying Shock Briefcase

When it comes to protecting your valuables, you have a couple options that usually involve leaving them in a safe either at your home or in a bank vault. But what about for those times when you have to carry large amounts of cash around for those spontaneous big ticket items? Perhaps you have to pay off a bookie, or want to purchase that estate down by the lake with cold hard cash you just laundered out of your multi-trillion dollar government backed bailout? For these situations, we bring you the Super Safety Suitcase. Whether or not it’s legal in your state or country is besides the point, since you probably did much worse to acquire all this cash in the first place. But this unique security briefcase is designed to protect your goods on many levels. It’s main feature is a whole surface high-voltage pulse shock which emits from all surfaces, even the handle and lock. The high-voltage pulse output power exceeds 30,000 volts giving any unauthorized assailants a powerful enough shock to stop them in their tracks.

There are several other protection modes as well, but essentially the idea here is that you let the robber take your case without struggle and once they are at a safe distance you whip out your remote, press the button, and watch them fry. At the same time it will emit a high pitched alarm, the combination should be enough to get many would-be thieves to give up on the attempted burglary.

For drug dealers (FDA), bank managers and pretty much anyone on the board of directors at Goldman Sachs, this super case can be yours for around $250.

Just incase you didn’t totally understand, the company was nice enough to make the illustration you see above to give us a better idea.

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