Sperm Get Stupid from Cell Phone Radiation

Oh no! It seems that mobile phones are getting even more problematic than ever. After getting linked to everything from migraines to cancer, it seems that the radiation from cell phones is now being connected to stupid sperm. Yes, I’m talking about the little swimmers that lead into a conversation about the birds and the bees.

Researchers from the Cleveland Clinic placed semen samples next to mobile phones in talk mode for about an hour. The jars of swimmers placed next to the phones displayed “an increase in oxidative stress such as an significant increase in free radicals and oxidants and a decrease in antioxidants.” In layman’s terms, this translates to a decrease in sperm quality. They have reduced motility and viability.

Placing the jars of sperm next to mobile phones in talk mode is akin to using a Bluetooth headset. They say that this mimics the scenario of having a phone on your hip or in your pocket, given the relative proximity to your, um, special place. I wonder if it’s healthier to put your phone in your shirt pocket instead.